Women

Women are funny.....
I don't know about you, but I'm a guy. Or last time I checked,,I was.
And everybody knows, Guys like looking at girls,,,hell, even girls know guys like looking at em.

But you know what guys ?
It's the girls get gussied up for the other guys, that make us all winners.

 Why you think they spend so much money on makeup,fake eyelashes,fake hair, fake tans,fake boobs.

It's not for OooomWa's it's for the other guys they may run into.
Dammit, they're just a bunch of fakes.

But think about it for just a minute,,after you've been around a woman awhile and you've seen her at her worse,,, sick,tired,no sleep from taking care of the baby and such, she starts feeling relaxed.

She starts answering the door in curlers and a robe.....

And then it happens........ she becomes...faceless.

When I say..."Hey Honey,,,let's go out to eat"...and she says "hold on,,I got to put my face on"....??? 

I'm like WTF???? When did it fall off ???? Does it hurt when it falls off ??

And wtf's the deal anyway,,,I look at you for 3 days and you don't put your pretty face on...but we go to town and  whoooaa,,you gotta put  your face on for people who are only going to see you half an hour,,,oh and you spray that stuff on that makes you smell pretty and drives me wild... if you don't over spray,,,,,

but it wasn't for me.

Hold it,,,I'm sorry,,,I just came to the earth moving realization,,,,

that the other girls are doing it for me.
 And I wouldn't want to disappoint them,,,after they spent all that money and time.

Tell me this girl doesn't want me to look at her.

She's practically begging me to look at her.

And I like the way "Angry White Dude" thinks...absolutely brilliant idea !!


Ernie,I don't give a shit what they say  

,,,still makes me feel better ;)

But I tell you what guys,,,you might want to keep your trap shut about this earth shattering news.

And not discuss this blog,,,,,just take her more places and she'll always have her face on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I don't get out much. I hardly know my neighbors. Seems like I mostly sleep and work. 

But I still like to check every now and then,just to see,, what's going on around me.

Put your zip code in the box and you may be surprised. Who Knows ?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


A  beautiful fairy appeared one day to a destitute  Mexican refugee Outside an Arizona   immigration office.

 "Good man," the fairy  said, "I've been sent here by President Obama  and told to grant you three wishes, since you  just arrived in the United States with your  wife and eight children."

 The man told  the fairy,  "Well, where I come from we  don't have the good Teeth, so I want new  teeth, maybe a lot of gold in them."

 The  fairy looked at the man's almost toothless grin  and -- PING !-- he
 Had a brand new shining set  of gold teeth in his mouth!

 "What else?"  asked the fairy, "Two more to go."

 The  refugee claimant now got bolder.  "I need a  big house with a three Car garage in Phoenix on the water with eight bedrooms for my family  and the rest of my relatives who still live in my country..  I want to bring them all over  here" --- and -- PING !-- in the distance there  could Be seen a beautiful mansion with a  three car garage, a long driveway, a walkout  patio with a BBQ in an upscale neighborhood  overlooking the water.

 "One more wish",  said the fairy, waving her wand.

 "Yes,  one more wish.  I want to be like an  American with American Clothes

instead of  these torn clothes, and a baseball cap instead  of
 This sombrero.  And I want to have  white skin like Americans" ---and --- PING !  -- The man was transformed - wearing worn out  jeans, a Diamond-Backs T-shirt and a baseball  cap.

 He had his bad teeth back and the  mansion had disappeared from the horizon.

 "What happened to my new  teeth?"  He wailed, "Where is my new  house?"

 THIS IS GOOD . . . . . . .  .

 NO, ACTUALLY THIS IS VERY GOOD . . ..  . .

.

 The fairy said:
 "Tough s***,  Amigo, Now that you are a White American, you  have to fend for yourself." So go get a job, pay taxes, pay for your medical, pay for your housing and food and see most of your money being spent on illegals.

Yeahhh,, suck it up cupcake !!  You're an American now !!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hope you have a great week and let your Spirit soar.

feels good to be me

Okay,,,educational time,,,Hey, just doing what I can to help the homeschoolers.....

Do you know why women rub their eyes when they wake up in the morning ???




It's because they have no balls =)


I'm not a very religous man, I do believe in some kind of God,,,

or I must. I sure talk to him alot. 

I think because he doesn't point and laugh.

Fate ? Coincedences ? Opportunites ? Decisions ?

Is it a coincedent fate sends you an opportunity to make a ... decision ?

So shit or get off the pot.




Theories
=========

There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers
exactly what the universe is for and why it is here, it will
instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more
bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another theory which states that this has already
happened.

from The Mountain:
Don't ponder too much on the above quote.
It's a joke


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey, somebody get that mule out of the briar patch =)

WHOA WHOA WHOAAAAAA !! STOP !!!!
Have a seat,,,,relax,,,take a deep breath.
Seriously,,,I'm waiting...............
............
.......

Okay,,exhale....empty your lungs,,,and empty your mind of chores,duties and errands.

Relax for 5 minutes....I know in today's  busy world, most of us forget... to relax.

Ehh,,,let's just let Kid Rock and Uncle Kracker do the yappin. I'm relaxin.

The finger monkey is the tiniest living primate in the world. 

It’s so small that it can hold on to your finger.

This cute little primate hugs and grips on to your finger so tight that it

pulls your heartstrings and you wish you could take it home with you. 

Finger monkeys are, as a matter of fact, pygmy marmosets. 

They are also known by the names ‘pocket monkey’ and ‘tiny lion’

. 

These primates belong to the family Callitrichidae, species Cebuella and genus C. Pygmaea. 

They are native to rain-forests of Brazil, Peru, Bolivia, Ecuador and Colombia.

Have a great week !!

Sad how things work out in nature.

Can't Remember the Title

Hey there,,I hope you're doing well.

I know life is getting a little rough when you wind up here. 

You've already done everything on the internet and this is the last stop.
Bored out of your socks aintcha ?

It's been a good week,,, 

Heck, they're all good weeks if you're walking,talking and wiping your own drool. (in my book)
Believe me I know from experience.


I don't know how your mind works,,,but OoomWa's is screwed.
I'll be walking along,alone,thinking about all the bullshit going on in the 

world, in the U.S.,, in the state,county, my town and our neighborhood and

I come up with an idea that would solve everybodies problem.

Then it happens,,,"OOOO something shiny !!" and my idea disappears.

I'm sorry about that :/

Dammit,,we was this close -

But anyways,,, sometimes I set here and my mind races with thoughts and questions.
Then, I'm just blank, I really have nothing to talk about. 

Oh sure,,I could talk about the news,,,naaa,,,we're here because we're tired of the news,,,

(it's a real downer)

So tell me,,,,what are you looking for ???
In my mind,,,the perfect place has something for everybody,,,and is user friendly.

Do you want Porn ? Well,,,I don't post porn. 

Maybe some cleavage or a bikini clad babe, Oh Yeah

And who knows maybe even a hot guy for you ladies.

But that's about it from me.

HeHeHe !! Okay,,Okay,,I hear ya grumblin,,,,

Keep your shirt on !!

Or better yet, take it off !!

 However,, over there on the right side of the page,

in the box labeled "cool places"is a couple links for ya.

They're not actually porn sites, but it's available if you want it. 

You're Welcome.

Ernie's has a variety of things,maybe a ramble,cool games,boobs,

reviews on autos and guns,tributes to soldiers...etc.

He also raises money and frequent flier miles to send 

young service men and women home for the holidays

.(Good guy in my book)

He's very popular and has a bunch of links for what your har,,, ummm heart desires.
Ernie's is a one man show,,,and he does a great job. 

(Like I said,,a little something for everybody)

The little links outlined in green are safe,,,the ones in red are nnnnasty,,,just so you know

Morty's is whole different story.

It's a community of people from all over the world, intertwined into a twisted world, 

and anybody who joins can start threads and share links,stories and info.

So there's a veryyy wiiiide variety of things there,,,,jokes,games,laughs,and yes,,,

even useless porn. The nnnnasty links are identified by a (NSFW).
 Be sure to check the comments for most of the humor while you're there.


Music ? well if you're not into stealing,
go join Amazon.com, you'll be glad you did, they'll give ya free mp3's
I'm not too sure what kind of deal they have, but I like it. 

And not only that,they also have some "good deals on a lot of other stuff".
 

itunes is cool too,,but I like the amazon more.

So tell me,,,what else do we need ??



Games !!!    I removed the old addicting game link(it was lame) and posted a couple new links in the Games box, I prefer albinoblacksheep myself,, but hey ,that's me.

And just to get your fingers limbered up
Here's a game I like,,nice and simple,,it just takes the right and left arrow keys and the space bar. 

Oh,,,you can even run on the walls too. Just so ya know.

It's time to run. 

Have a great weekend,,,Share some links, put em in the comment box,,

Be safe out there,,spring and summer is just around the corner

and we don't want to miss that

It was a long week

Sometimes I feel like I need to wash my eyeballs after visiting some websites.

"Hell I feel like that after I go to Walmart sometimes"
And there's those times you know,,,all the scrubbing in the world isn't 

going to erase the images or the words burned into your retina or soul.

If it says "do not click here" or "warning: graphic image",NSFW(not safe for work).
You can bet your ass,,,it's going to be just that.
But what is it ? Why does the human mind want to click on the 'Do Not Click Here'

I Double Dog Dare Ya.


Put The Big Red Button on your site


Yeah,,,dammmmiiit !! Didcha learn anything there ??
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I tell ya,,,fits hittin the shan over on the other side of the world.

It's rough being a dictator these days

Honesty is still the best policy

A successful business man was growing old and knew it was time

to choose a successor to take over the business.

  Instead of choosing one of his Directors or his children, 

he decided to do something different. 

He called all the young executives in his company together.

  He said, "It is time for me to step down and choose the next CEO.

I have decided to choose one of you.

The young executives were Shocked, but the boss continued.

"I am going to give each one of you a SEED today - one very special SEED".

I want you to plant the seed, water it, and come back here one year from today

with what you have grown from the seed I have given you.
  I will then judge the plants that you bring, and the one  I choose will be the next CEO."

  One man, named Jim, was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed.

He went home and excitedly, told his wife the story.

She helped him get a pot, soil and compost and he planted the seed.

Everyday, he would water it and watch to see if it had grown.

After about three weeks, some of the other executives began to talk about their seeds 

and the plants that were beginning to grow.

  Jim kept checking his seed, but nothing ever grew.

  Three weeks, four weeks, five weeks went by, still nothing.

  By now, others were talking about their plants, 

but Jim didn't have a plant and he felt like a failure.

  Six months went by -- still nothing in Jim's pot.

He just knew he had killed his seed.

Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing.

Jim didn't say anything to his colleagues, however,

he just kept watering and fertilizing the soil

- He so wanted the seed to grow.

  A year finally went by and all the young executives of the company 

brought their plants to the CEO for inspection.

  Jim told his wife that he wasn't going to take an empty pot. 

But she asked him to be honest about what happened.

Jim felt sick to his stomach, 

it was going to be the most embarrassing moment of his life,

but he knew his wife was right.

He took his empty pot to the board room.

When Jim arrived, he was amazed at  the variety of plants grown by the other executives.

They were beautiful -- in all shapes and sizes. 

Jim put his empty pot on the floor and many of his colleagues laughed,

a few felt sorry for him!

  When the CEO arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted his young executives.
 Jim just tried to hide in the back. 

"My, what great plants, trees and flowers you have grown," said the CEO.

"Today one of you will be appointed the next CEO!"

  All of a sudden, the CEO spotted Jim at the back of the room with his empty pot.

He ordered the Financial Director to bring him to the front. Jim was terrified. 

He thought, "The CEO knows I'm a failure! Maybe he will have me fired!"

  When Jim got to the front, the CEO asked him what had happened to his seed 

Jim told him the story.

  The CEO asked everyone to sit down except Jim. 

He looked at Jim, and then announced to the young executives,

"Behold your next Chief Executive Officer! His name is Jim!"

Jim couldn't believe it. Jim couldn't even grow his seed.

  "How could he be the new CEO?" the others said.

  Then the CEO said, "One year ago today, I gave everyone in this room a seed. 

I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today.

But I gave you all boiled seeds; they were dead - it was not possible for them to grow.
   All of you, except Jim, have brought me trees and plants and flowers.

When you found that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you.

Jim was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it. 

Therefore, he is the one who will be the new Chief Executive Officer!"

~~~~~~

Remember this while you garden your way thru life......

  * If you plant honesty, you will reap trust

  * If you plant goodness, you will reap friends

  * If you plant humility, you will reap greatness

  * If you plant perseverance, you will reap contentment

  * If you plant consideration, you will reap perspective

  * If you plant hard work, you will reap success

  * If you plant forgiveness, you will reap reconciliation

  So, be careful what you plant now; it will determine what you will reap later.


 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  Do you know what the relationship is between your two eyes?

  They blink together,
  they move together,
  they cry together,
  they see things together,
  and they sleep together,
  but they never see each other;
  ....that's what friendship is..
  Your aspiration is your motivation,
  your motivation is your belief,
  your belief is your peace,
  your peace is your target,
  your target is heaven,

and life is like hard core torture without it!



  Save the Earth.... it's the only planet with chocolate!!!!
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man, his wife, and mother-in-law went on vacation to the Holy Land.

While they were there the mother-in-law passed away.

The undertaker told them, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, 

 or you can bury her here in the Holy Land for $150.00."

The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked, "Why?" Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your mother-in-law home, 

when it would be wonderful to spend only $150.00?"

The man said, "A man died here 2000 years ago, he was buried here and 

three days later he rose from the dead.

  I just can' t take that chance."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's been awhile,,,let's check in on Jodi

Oh I really like this

Click on the picture to see some other futuristic autos


I don't care what you say,,,they just don't make men like they used to.

R.I.P. Sargeant Atkins

You Gotta be Shittin Me !!

Are you a bloghopper ? I mean do you ever click on the "next blog" button, to see where it takes you ?? 

You should try it sometimes. But NOT YET !!

Read mine first,,, then start hoppin,,,who knows,,,you may find somebody you admire.

Most of you would never think that I almost named this blog,

"You Gotta Be Shittin Me !"

"No Kidding !!"


Some history buffs probably already know this forgotten  fact.

I didn't know until I got this info in a email from Cousin Donna.
So I know it's true !!


Have you ever wondered who first uttered the phrase  'You Gotta Be Shittin Me'?

Well, it just  so happens to have originated through the Father of  Our Country, 

way back when George Washington  was crossing the Delaware River with his  troops.

There were 33 (remember this  number) in Washington's boat. It was
extremely  dark and storming furiously and the water was tossing  them about.

Finally,  Washington grabbed Corporal Peters (remember this name)  and
stationed him at the front of the boat  with a lantern.

He ordered him to keep  swinging it, so they could see where they were  heading.

Corporal Peters, through driving rain  and cold, continued swinging the lantern 

back and forth, back and forth.

Then a big gust  of wind and a wave hit and threw Corporal Peters  and
his lantern into the Delaware . Washington and his troops searched for
nearly an hour  trying to find Corporal Peters, but to no avail. 

All  of them felt terrible, for the Corporal had  been one of their favorites.

Sometime  later, Washington and his troops landed on the other  side,wet and totally exhausted .

He rallied  the troops and told them that they must go  on.

Another hour later, one of his men  said, 'General, I see lightsahead.' 

They  trudged toward the lights and came upon a huge  house.
What they didn't know was that this was  a house of Ill Repute,

hidden in the forest to serve all who came.

General Washington  pounded on the door, his men crowding around  him.
The door swung open, and much to his surprise stood a beautiful woman.
A huge smile  came across her face, to see so many men standing  there.

Washington was the first to speak,  'Madam, I am General GeorgeWashington and  these are my men.

We are tired , wet, exhausted and desperately need warmth and  comfort.'

Again, the Madam looked at all  the men standing there, and with a
broad smile  on her face, said, 'Well, General, you have come to  the right place. 

We can surely give you warmth  and comfort. How many men do you  have?'

Washington replied , 'Well, Madam,  there are 32 of us without Peters, and  the Madam said,

'You gotta be shittin me.'


 ManOMan,,, It's almost as if spring is here,,,but I know better. See that weather underground icon on the right side of my page ? It gives the local temp here and the wrong damn time. (it's an hour behind me for some reason today.(Stupid)
But you can click on that, it'll take you to the local page for here, type your city or zipcode in the search bar on that page and it'll give you your local weather and some of the news. 

I think you'll like it,,,save it in your favs ;o)

Man it has been beautiful outside,,,it's almost time to drag the spyder out and clean her up,,,then go have some fun. I'm ready to feel the wind in my hair,,,and across the top of my bald head.
At least in this part of the world,,I can still afford a little fun,,,,but dang !! I wouldn't want to be caught speeding in other parts of the world...Speeding Fines


I think when the nice officer asks,, "Sir,why are you speeding ??"

I'm going to tell him/her/it,,,"I'm trying to out run the solar flares"



There's a whole lot of shaking going on.


 Faith is not about everything turning out OK; 

Faith is about being OK no matter how things turn out.

Have a great weekend !!

Make up your own title

5 More Nights
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Here's a neat little trick,,,and I bet it does more than just drains.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wish this for you.....someday.. years and years from now...or maybe it will make small imperfections not seem so bad now if you think about it like this...;-)
The Funeral

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST

She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. 

Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. 

Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. 

Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. 

And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.



Keep reading,,,,,,,,,,,,they get better!!!


 

 A WOMAN'S REVENGE

'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.

As she fumbled for her wallet , I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. 

'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.

'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me, 

and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'


UNDERSTANDING WOMEN

(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) 

I know I'm not going to understand women. 

I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, 

pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.


MARRIAGE SEMINAR

While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, 

Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,

'It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes.'

He addressed the man, 'Can you name your wife's favorite flower?' 

Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, 'It's Pillsbury, isn't it?




CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles..

The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. 

He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife..

She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, 

he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.

She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?

He answers, 'You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store 

to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco 

and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo- ooo much cheaper.

So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she. 

(I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!)


WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. 

An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'

'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'


TooooShayyyy



WORDS

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day... 

30,000 to a man's 15,000.

The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men.... 

The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'



CREATION

A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be 

so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.

'The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain. 

God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; 

God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you !


WHO DOES WHAT

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.

The wife said, 'You should do it because you get up first, and then we don't have to 

wait as long to get our coffee.

The husband said, 'You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'

Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.'

Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me..'

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says 'HEBREWS'


The Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him 

at 5:0 0 AM for an early morning business flight.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.

Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him,
when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.

The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'

 

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.




God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I sometimes think about some of the jobs I've had....

I've had some good ones and I've had some that really sucked,,,but I stuck with it and saw them through.

Nobody can say I ever gave up because the going got too rough.

But I never had a job as tough as George,,,job well done Sir.... *Salute*

Have a great weekend !!!

Start Looking !!

 I want you to take a couple of minutes and read the following, then take a couple more minutes and I want you to think about the HUGE trade deficit that's going on with China and the other foreign countries.

Then take a couple minutes and think about your job and where you would be with out it. Think about your kids, your grandkids and their grandkids

think about the neighbors, the towns, the counties the states.

Now then,,,,GIVE ME ONE REASON,,,you shouldn't buy,,,

"MADE IN THE U.S.A."

Now on with the story...........

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A physics teacher in high school once told the students that while one grasshopper on the railroad tracks wouldn't slow a train very much, a billion of them would.  With that thought in mind, read the following, obviously written by a good American.

       Good idea .... one light bulb at a time ....
 
Check this out.  I can verify this because I was in Lowe's the other day for some reason and just for the heck of it I was looking at the hose attachments.  They were all made in  China .  The next day I was in Ace Hardware and just for the heck of it I checked the hose attachments there. They were made in  USA . Start looking.  (note here: earlier this week, RZ was in Lowes looking for a sprinkler head. Looked at RainBird and Looked at Orbits.  RainBird is made inMexico ; Orbits in the  USA .  Orbits purchased!!)
 
In our current economic situation, every little thing we buy or do affects someone else - even their job . So, after reading this email, I think this lady is on the right track.  Let's get behind her!
 
My grandson likes Hershey's candy.  I noticed, though, that it is marked made in  Mexico  now.  I do not buy it any more.



        My favorite toothpaste, Colgate, is made in  Mexico ... now I have switched to Crest. You have to read the labels on everything.



   This past weekend I was at Kroger.  I needed 60 W light bulbs and Bounce dryer sheets.  I was in the light bulb aisle, and right next to the GE brand I normally buy was an off-brand labeled "Everyday Value.  " I picked up both types of bulbs and compared the stats - they were the same except for the price.  The GE bulbs were more money than the Everyday Value brand but the thing that surprised me the most was the fact that GE was made in MEXICO and the Everyday Value brand was made in - get ready for this - the USA in a company in Cleveland, Ohio.
 
So throw out the myth that you cannot find products you use every day that are made right here.
 
So on to another aisle - Bounce Dryer Sheets.  Yep, you guessed it... Bounce cost more money and is made in  Canada .  The Everyday Value brand was less money and MADE IN THE  USA !  

I did laundry yesterday and the dryer sheets performed just like the Bounce Free I have been using for years and at almost half the price!
 
My challenge to you is to start reading the labels when you shop for everyday things and see what you can find that is made in the  USA - the job you save may be your own or your neighbors!
 
If you accept the challenge, pass this on to others in your address book so we can all start buying American, one light bulb at a time! Stop buying from overseas companies!
 
We should have awakened a decade ago.
 
Let's get with the program.  Help our fellow Americans keep their jobs and create more jobs here in the U.S.A.
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's as simple as that.... "No Kidding"

Well what are you setting there for ??

Get busy,,,tell your friends !!

Hey it's Friday !!

Well I'm recovering from my slip and fall quite nicely.(feeling very lucky)
A buddy did the samething and fractured the ball in his shoulder,,,six weeks off,,gotta take it easy. 

Easier said than done.

We got between 8 and 10" of snow.
Okay, Let's call it 9". What do ya do with 9" of snow ? (Hope it melts real soon)
Rake some of it out of the way,,but where to ? Somewhere else in the way ?

Thankfully...Mother Nature blessed us with a nice warm day,,,it was 4 degrees this morning, but got up over 45 degrees this afternoon,,,and the sun shined brilliantly.

The Princess and I raked some from behind the house,,,where the sun never shines (ha)
from around the autos and off her car.Threw snowballs at one another
Cleared from the porch, to the cars...and we was wore out. Thanks Mo =)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I like Fred,,,and I never got to meet him.
Rest in Peace Fred

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Myspace done went and did it...

I been looking for somebody to pick on and them bastards stepped up to the plate.

I go there so often,,,3 or 4 times last year,,,honest injun !

Here's a note just like the other 4 they sent me...about my videos.

Audio or video content has been blocked from attempted upload or removed from your profile.
Content may have been blocked/removed because the content was recognized by MySpace's Copyright Filter, because we received a notice of alleged infringement from the copyright owner, or because your use of the content otherwise violated MySpace's Terms and Conditions. As a result, your upload privileges have been suspended.Information about the blocked or removed content can be found on the Copyright Management Page. The Copyright Management Page has a link to the Copyright Education Program, which you must complete to reinstate your upload privileges. The Copyright Management Page also has a link to a form you can submit if you believe if the content was misidentified or was removed in error.MySpace terminates the accounts of repeat copyright infringers. Please be careful not to include content on your profile that you do not have permission to use so you can continue to be a part of the MySpace community.
Thank you,
MySpace.com.

Of course,,I replied to them...My reply was short and sweet ....."thppppt"

Maybe I'll go back in 6 months and see if they replied to my message.
(And you wonder why your site is going down the crapper)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The TRUEST TRUE Definitions of tools....


DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.

WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the 

workbench with the speed of light . 

Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time

it takes you to say, 'Oh shoot !'

SKILL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.

PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.

BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs

into major refinishing jobs.

HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle... 

It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt 

to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.

VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. 

If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various 

flammable objects in your shop on fire.

Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.

TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to 

launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes , trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.

BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.

TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of 

everything you forgot to disconnect.

PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads..

STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms.

PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you

needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.

HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to make hoses too short.

HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.

UTILITY KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.

SON-OF-A-BITCH TOOL: (A personal favorite!!) Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling 'Son of a BITCH!' at the top of your lungs. 

It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need.

Hope you found this informative.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm not going political on you, I don't know if it's even a true story or who wrote it.

But somebody cared enough to put it in a email, so I'll share.

SOMETHING WE ALL NEED TO KNOW

     We need to read this very carefully and think about what is being said here !!!

          . . I remember asking dad about Castro when I was about 9 years old.

I asked , "Is Castro a good guy or bad?"

Dad said he couldn't tell!! This was about 1955.

 

We were living in Louisiana at the time. Dad was in the army there. 

Cuba was fairly close and in the news a lot.  The Cubans were asking the same question!

Ike was president.

            This past July, we had the pleasure of sharing a summer barbecue with a refugee from Cuba . 

Our dinner conversation was starkly different than most.

 

This refugee came to the  United States as a young boy in the early 1960s.  

His family was more fortunate than most as they were able
            to bring a suitcase and $100 when they fled Castro's newly formed revolutionary paradise.

            Our dinner consisted of all-American fare: hamburgers, potato salad, 

watermelon and fresh ears of sweet corn.  

This is a menu shared with family and friends nationwide, while celebrating the 

birth of our beloved America on the Fourth of July.

            We began with a simple discussion about our country and the direction it has taken

since Barack Obama came to power.

  

We shared the usual complaints about the sour economy and liberal social engineering 

emanating from the rulers in Washington .

            But then he said it.  The sentence came naturally.  I assume it was unplanned. 

But it carried the weight of a freight train.  

 

"You know when Castro took power, none of us knew he was a Communist."
            We sat stunned.  He continued,

"Yes, we all thought he was a patriot, a  nationalist.  Before the revolution he didn't sound like a radical."

            The comparison at this point was easy, and I interjected, "You mean  just like Barack Obama?" 

He responded, "Yes, just like Barack Obama."

            He continued, "We were all shocked as the government just continued to grab more power.  First they said the revolution is over, so please turn in your guns.  We all complied."

            "I remember my uncle saying after it started, 'Castro will only nationalize some of the big industries, he will never come and take our family hardware store.

 

'But that is exactly what happened, 

Castro started with the sugar mills and the large industries, 

but they eventually came and knocked on the door of our family hardware store.
            My family had run this store for generations.

 

They said we now own the hardware store, you work for us.  

And that nice, large four-bedroom home you own, it is now our property also, and you can move yourself and five children into two rooms of the house because others are moving in with you."

            The lesson learned from this discussion is a lesson most Americans refuse to hear. 

 

Political leaders can lie about their agenda and once in office they can take totally unexpected turns.
            If you had asked us three years ago if we thought General Motors would be nationalized, 

we would have never believed it.

  

We could never  contemplate a country where the rule of law, the most fundamental  building block of a justice society would be evaporating just like it did in Castro's Cuba in the early 1960s.

            But the news of injustice keeps increasing.  Black Panthers are not
            charged with wrongdoing by the U.S. Department of Justice because their crimes are against whites. 

The bondholders of GM are stripped of their assets without due process by the government.  

Governmental leaders are bribed in full daylight only to have all 

investigations of the crimes stifled by the Attorney General.

 

The  U.S. borders are overrun with crime and illegal activity and the leaders in D.C. act as if it is important to protect the lawbreakers while the innocent are killed and overrun.

            When local communities attempt to enforce the law,

they are ridiculed and threatened as racists and bigots.  

They are sued by the very administration entrusted with enforcing the law.
            Without the rule of law the U.S. Constitution is a sham.

  

Without the rule of law our beloved America is swiftly becoming a country where
            only the well connected and politically powerful will be safe. 

As  Michelle Malkin has so eloquently explained in her recent book, 

a culture of corruption has replaced honest government.
            The only way this problem will be fixed is by massive citizen action.

            All honest citizens that want to be treated equally must come together and demand that the favoritism, the bribes, the uneven enforcement of  law end now.  And yes, it can happen here.
         And may God save the United States of America !
             

IN GOD WE TRUST!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Did you know a barnacle's penis is 30 times its body length ?? that's right 30 TIMES !!

Relatively few barnacles reproduce sexually, but those that do have a hard time. After all, they can't move - so their penises, up to 30 times their body length, wave around in currents until encountering a female.
"Just lettin it ALL hang out"

The surprises of animal sex.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Something from the Queen,,,she's gearin up for that cave I'm going to live in when the fit hits the shan.

Be sure to click on similar buildings while you're there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We all look forward to every brave man and woman on foreign soil returning home safely. Check out this beautiful compilation of surprised friends and family experiencing a homecoming they will never forget! Don’t forget to thank the next Veteran or Soldier you see and keep supporting our troops, until they all come home.



And if you can't stand behind and support our troops,,,feel free to stand in front of them.

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Be careful out there

WHAM BAM THANK YA MAM.....

We got about 5" of new snow on top of that freezing rain we had a couple of days ago,,, 

which had mostly melted,,,except for the shaded areas.
I had to work and had already been out and started the Scion to let it warm up,, and swept it off.

Came back in the house, finished getting ready. 

We had a list a while back,,,so I wouldn't forget something. takes alot of crap to be gone 12 hours.
Phone,bluetooth.internet card,2 sets of keys,glasses,pocket knife,wallet,2 bandannas,smokes,lighters,
loose change and the Queen keeps my backpack stocked with a bunch of goodies.

I hugged the Queen and the Princess goodbye and got the usual,,,

"you be careful out there,,it's slick,,,watch out for deer,,,

watchout for all them other crazy people too....blah,blah,blah..
and I headed out on my excursion.

About 10 steps from the back door and POW !!

Some bastard just hit me in the face with a sno,,,,nope,,I'm horizontal. 

WIPE OUT !!
I hit the ground on my side before I realized I was falling.

Got up, looked around to see if anybody saw me and there

was 2 little snowbirds falling all over themselves laughing at me.

The Queen heard me go thud and come out to check on me.
She got me a towel and gave me words of encouragement.

(Get out there and try again Big Boy)
I can definately drive better on the snow and ice than I can walk.
I waited till I got to work to do a total damage assessment.

Dern good thing the ground was there to break my fall.

Plus the back pack kinda sorta took some of the blast.
Popped a tab off of one of the zippers somehow,,,and blowed the top out of a

bag of shoestring potato chips.(glad it wasn't the bottom)

The later it got into the night,,the more I realized I had jarred myself pretty good.
Probably tried to cram my shoulder in my ear.

Decided to come home early since there wasn't much going on at work.

Most of the hurt is gone today,,,but still tender.

Pop's is right,,,us old farts don't bounce.
So ya'll be careful out there,,,no matter how old ya are.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gullible
=========


I didn't write this, although I wish I had.

How many of the things below have you heard and believed?


THE REAL STORY!!!!!!!


Big companies don't do business via chain letters.

Bill Gates is not giving you $1000, and Disney is not giving you
a free vacation.

There is no baby food company issuing class-action checks.

Proctor and Gamble is not part of a satanic cult or scheme, and
its logo is not satanic.

MTV will not give you backstage passes if you forward something
to the most people.

The Gap is not giving away free clothes. Nissan nor Honda is
giving away a free car. You can relax; there is no need to pass
it on "just in case it's true."

There is no kidney theft ring in New Orleans. No one is waking
up in a bathtub full of ice, even if a friend of a friend swears
it happened to their cousin. If you are hell-bent on believing
the kidney-theft ring stories, I quote: "The National Kidney
Foundation has repeatedly issued requests for actual victims of
organ thieves to come forward and tell their stories." None
have. That's "none" as in "zero", "zip" ~~ not even your
friend's cousin. Not even if your uncle is a lawyer and says
it's true.

Neiman Marcus doesn't really sell a $200 cookie recipe.

If the latest NASA rocket disaster DID contain plutonium that
went to particulate over the eastern seaboard, do you REALLY
think this information would reach the public via an AOL chain
letter?

There is no gang initiation plot to murder any motorist who
flashes headlights at another car driving at night without
lights.

Craig Shergold (or Sherwood, or Sherman, etc) in England is not
dying of cancer or anything else at this time and would like
everyone to stop sending him their business cards. He apparently
is no longer a "little boy" either.

The "Make a Wish" foundation is a real organization doing fine
Work, but they have had to establish a special toll free hot
line in response to the large number of Internet hoaxes using
their good name and reputation. It is distracting them from the
important work they do.

If you are one of those who forwards anything that "promises"
something bad will happen if you "don't,"  DON'T forward it, you
will be fine.

Women really are suffering in Afghanistan, but forwarding an e-
mail won't help their cause in the least. If you want to help,
contact your local legislative representative, or get in touch
with Amnesty International or the Red Cross.

As a general rule, e-mail "signatures" are easily faked and mean
nothing to anyone with any power to do anything about whatever
the competition is complaining about.

KFC really does use real Chickens with feathers and beaks and
feet. No, they really do. I read this in email.
HA! So, why did they change their name?
In this health conscious world, what was KFC's name?
Kentucky FRIED Chicken. FRIED is not healthy. So with the
help of a focus group, they changed the name to KFC. It's
short, doesn't offend dieters and it's easy to remember.

Another thing, just because someone said in a message, four
generations back, that "we checked it out and it's legit," does
not actually make it true.

There is no bill pending before Congress that will allow long
distance companies to charge you for using the Internet.

Bottom Line... composing e-mail or posting something on the Net
is as easy as writing on the walls of a public restroom. Don't
automatically believe it until it's proven false... ASSUME it's
false, unless there is proof that it's true.


Now tell everybody you know,, or else......




~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I stopped by the Chevrolet Dealership yesterday, for a look at the new Silverado 1500 pickup. 

Just for fun, I took it out for a test drive. I wanted to sense that new "feel" before they become extinct...

The salesman (a black man wearing an Obama "change" lapel pin) sat in the passenger 

seat describing the truck and all its "wonderful" options. 

The seats were of particular interest. 

He explained that the seats directed warm air to your butt in the winter and 

directed cool air to your butt in the summer heat.

Feeling like messing with him, I mentioned that this must be a Republican truck.
 Looking a bit angry, he asked why I thought it was a Republican truck.

I explained that if it were a Democrat truck, the seats would blow smoke up your ass year-round.

I had to walk back to the dealership... Damn guy had no sense of humor.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Remember I love a woman in uniform,,,
ohohohoh,,,these ladies can arrest me anytime,,,weapons of mass distraction
Frisk me Baby,,,I may have something on me
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gettin Old isn't for Sissy's

A few good Senior Moments

Garage Door
The boss walked into the office one morning not knowing his zipper was down and his fly area wide open. His assistant walked up to him and said, 'This morning when you left your house, did you close your garage door?' The boss told her he knew he'd closed the garage door, and walked into his office puzzled by the question.

   As he finished his paperwork, he suddenly noticed his fly was open, and zipped it up. He then understood his assistant's question about his 'garage door.'

He headed out for a cup of coffee and paused by her desk to ask, 'When my garage door was open, did you see my Hummer parked in there?'

She smiled and said, 'No, I didn't. All I saw was an old mini van with two flat tires..




An elderly gentleman....
Had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%
The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, 'Your hearing is perfect.. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.'
The gentleman replied, 'Oh, I haven't told my family yet.
I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will three times!'



Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: 'Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?'
Slim says, 'I feel just like a newborn baby.'
'Really!? Like a newborn baby!?'
'Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.'



An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen..
The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great.. I would recommend it very highly.'
The other man said, 'What is the name of the restaurant?'
The first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love?
You know.... The one that's red and has thorns.'

  'Do you mean a rose?'
'Yes, that's the one,' replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?'


  Hospital regulations   require a wheel chair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he   d idn't need my help to leave the hospital.
After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator.
On the way down I asked him if his wife was meeting him.
'I don't know,' he said. 'She's still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown.'



  Couple in their nineties   are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember   ..
Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair.

'Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?' he asks.
'Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?'
'Sure..'
'Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?' she asks.
'No, I can remember it.'
'Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so   a s not to forget it?'
He says, 'I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries.'
'I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it down?' she asks.
Irritated, he says, 'I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness sake!'
Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes,   The old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs.. She stares at the plate for a moment.
'Where's my toast ?'



  A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy:
'So I hear you're getting married?'
'Yep!'
'Do I know her?'
'Nope!'
'This woman, is she good looking?'
'Not really.'
'Is she a good cook?'
'Naw, she can't cook too well.'
'Does she have lots of money?'
'Nope! Poor as a church mouse.'
'Well, then, is she good in bed?'
'I don't know.'
'Why in the world do you want to marry her then?'
'Because she can still drive!'



  Three old guys are out walking.
First one says, 'Windy, isn't it?'
Second one says, 'No, it's Thursday!'
Third one says, 'So am I. Let's go get a beer..'



  A man was telling his neighbor, 'I just bought a new hearing aid.

It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art.. It's perfect.'
'Really,' answered the neighbor . 'What kind is it?'
'Twelve thirty..'



  Morris , an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.
A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, 'You're really doing great, aren't you?'
Morris replied, 'Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.''
The doctor said, 'I didn't say that.. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful.'



One more. . .........!
A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool.. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split.
The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?'
'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis.'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Diary of a Snow Shoveler

December 8: 6:00 PM. It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9: We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the Whole World? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had. Shoveled snow for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life.

December 12: The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment. My neighbor tells me not to worry, we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. l don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man I'm glad he's our neighbor.

December 14: Snow lovely snow! 8" last night. The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. l didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish l wouldn't huff and puff so.

December 15: 20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.

December 16: Ice storm this morning. Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour, which I think was very cruel.

December 17: Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.

December 20: Electricity's back on, but had another 14" of damn snow last night. More shoveling. Took all day. God damm snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.

December 22: Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white shit fell today, and it's so cold it probably won't melt till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to piss. By the time I got undressed, pissed and dressed again. I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plow on his truck for the rest of the winter; but he says he's too busy. I think the asshole is lying.

December 23: Only 2" of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she nuts!!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did but I think she's lying.

December 24: 6". Snow packed so hard by snowplow, l broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the son of a bitch who drives that snowplow, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was busy watching for that goddamn snowplow.

December 25: Merry Christmas. 20 more inches of the !=3D@x@!x!x1 slop tonight. Snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. God I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's an idiot. If I have to watch "It's a Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to kill her.

December 26: Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.

December 27: Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze.

December 28: Warmed up to above -50. Still snowed in. THE BITCH is driving me crazy!!!!!

December 29: 10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30: Roof caved in. The snow plow driver is suing me for a million dollars. The wife went home to her mother. 9" predicted.

December 31: Set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.

January 8: I feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed?

-Author Unknown 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Weee !! about 4" inches of the white powdery substance fell today,,,,

Spring will be here soon,,,Stay safe,,,stay warm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Carbon Fiber Knife Making

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey Pops,,,let's expand our knowledge....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~