Hey it's me again !! I hope you missed me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I lost the Trivia Contest at the church social
last week by one question... The question was,,
Where do most women have curly hair ??,,,,
Apparently the correct answer is Africa
Whoda thought ?
Anyways, I was asked to find another place to worship. *Shrugs*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It's been a very freakin busy six months.
Mom and Pops in and out of the hospital, then
my sister took a turn. I can't tell you how
"Blessed" I am to still have them all.
Gained a beautiful,smart daughter-inlaw in
August.It was a great day.
Had a great family reunion back on Oct.16
Granny,Aunts,Uncles and cousins. All of them
awesome. I don't get to see much of them,,,they
live over there on the otherside of the world,,
in Oklahoma. And most of us are strangers.
Some of them,if I passed them on the sidewalk,
I'd never know. I've got cousins I've never even
met. But I hope to get the chance someday.
Yeah,,I know,,I know,,I just live in Arkansas.
But it's about an hour and half away,,,but then
it's a hour and half back.
Makes me miss my naptime. But it's worth missing
to get to see everybody at the sametime.
I look back now and it's funny,,,took awhile for
things to soak in,,,yes I'm kinda slow.
Back in Febuary or March, I showed up at Mom and
Pops and something like the following converstion
took place....
Pops:"Are we going to have a family reunion ??"
Me: (kinda stunned) Well I don't know.
Pops: Well you need to make up your mind.
Me: HUH ??
Pops:Yeah it's your responsibility now,,,your
inheritance.
Me: HUH ???? Really ?? Are you kidding me ??
Now you probably need to know,,me and Pops pull
each others legs all the time. So I'm not really
believing this just yet.
Pops: It's the truth, you are responsible for
making decisions concerning the reunions.
Me: Wow, How did this come about ?
Pops:You said you wanted to get to know the
family better.
Me: Ummm,,I believe my exact words were,,
"I wish I had more time to know the family
better." But okay,,,I think I can handle it.
Pops:I know you can. You're the man for the job.
There's been a huge lack of communication
over the years. We'd say we was having a
reunion and that's all we heard. We never
knew if anybody was going to show up or not.
Fix that.
Me: Ummm okay
Pops:So we gonna have a reunion or not ??
Me: I don't know, let me ask some people.
That was the end of that conversation that day.
A couple days later,,,Pops calls me (he calls me
every morning) and it's cool.
Pops: Good morning Number 1 (he calls me that all
the time, I'm not sure if it's because I'm
his first born or something else) Are we
going to have a family reunion ??
Me: Yeah looks like it.
Pops: Oh Good !! Where we going to have it ?
Me: Umm, I guess where we always do.
Pops: Well you better get around and rent the
building,,weekends don't last long.
Me: Ummmm Okay,are you sure I'm in charge of
this ??
Pops: Yep!
So I do a little internet searching and find some
phone numbers and make a couple of calls and
*WaaLaa* I've rented the building. Nothing to it,
piece of cake. I'm downright proud of myself !!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I found out 70% of the gay population was born gay,,,,the other 30% was sucked into it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The following morning this conversation...
Pops: Good Morning Number 1,,,Have you rented the
building yet ?
Me: Yes Pops,,it's done.
Pops:Oh good,,Least you don't have to worry about
that now. Is anybody coming ?? Who's picking up
the key ? We going to have Potluck or are you
cooking for everybody ?
Me:*Heavy Sigh* I don't know
Pops: Well you need to figure it out ! This stuff
isn't as easy as you think.
Me: Pops,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Pops: Huh ?
Me: Stop worrying about it,,,we have until
October.
Pops: Oh it will be here before you know it.
(and it was)
Well we rolled on.The Queen and I prepared for
our annual trip to Texas to hang with some
internet friends in May.
The Friday before we left, I watched my momma get
hauled away from home in a ambulance.
My mind was like a tornado of thoughts. To go to
Texas or not.
I'm a man of commitment, if I tell somebody I'll
do something I'll do my best to see it thru.
I almost never fail.(Failure is not an option)
Soooo,,having already sent money for food and
telling some friends I'd split the rent with
them. We decided to load up Sunday morning and
head to the Great state of Texas.
Pops called me that morning before we left and
told me he wasn't feeling to good.So that tornado
thing was going on in my mind again. Pops
encouraged me to go to Texas,,,because he's a man
of his word too.
I told him to keep the phone handy and to call
911 if he even thought something was wrong.
So we headed south and I hadn't even unpacked and
I get a call from my sister. Telling me she has
Pops at the hospital. And he wasn't doing too
good.
Yeah,,big O tornado of thoughts.I yakked with Mom
and Pops several times while I was down there.
That's probably the only thing that let me have
some relief. One of the things I love about cell phones !!
We had a great time visiting our friends for a
week and headed back on the following sunday.
Mom was out of the hospital by the time we got
back. She had some stints put in her kidney
tubes. She was in and out of the hospital a couple of times,,infection,,stint removal,,they put them back in,,,and I think she still has one in her today.
Pops was having a tough time tho. He had tripped over the power cord on his impact wrench a couple of days before our trip and apparently that tore some capillaries loose from his intestine and that section had actually died. And they learned this from exploratory surgery. They cut that section out and he was getting better. Then that come loose, so they had to open him back up,,clean him out then reconnected the intestine again. He had quite a time.
There was a couple of times thru all this, Pops told me,,,"I don't know if I'm going to make it."
One time I told him,,"Oh you're going to make it,,we got a family reunion in October. You ain't getting out of that.
He said I'll try and be there, but what if I don't make it ?
I told him,,"Don't worry about it,,if you don't,,
I'm going to drag your old dead ass there and charge the kids a buck a piece to let em poke ya with a stick.
Yep,,,that got him stirrin ;o)
I yakked with him on Fathers Day morning and he was feeling good. So me and the Princess loaded up to go see him and by the time we got there,,he wasn't so good. He had gotten in his wheelchair while the cleaning lady cleaned his room and changed the bedding. He decided to go into the restroom to wash up a bit, and flipped his wheelchair backwards, whacking his head on the floor.
I felt for the old guy, he told me it hurt behind his eyes,said his brain felt bruised. And I imagine it was.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
An old Italian man is dying.
He calls his grandson to his bedside.. " Guido, I wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome plated .38 revolver so you will always remember me."
"But grandpa, I really don't like guns. How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?"
"You lissina me, boy. Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos "
"Somma day you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man...
"Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, 'Time's Up'?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I went to see him a couple days later and he wasn't in his room. That's not always a good feeling but I was quickly informed he was eating at the dining area,,,YAY !!
I joined him at the dining area and he was sitting at a big table with a lot of other patients. I asked him how he felt and got the usual reply,,,"with my fingers".
I asked him,,"Do you remember the other day when you fell backwards in your wheelchair ?"
Pops said "Uhh Huhhh,,,my eyes still hurt.
I said,,,"good thing you landed on your head".
And at that moment,,,I knew he was going to be okay. If for nothing else,,just to get well and kick my ass.
Everybody else at the table thought it was funny.
But I think if Pops would of had the strength, I could of gotten my own room that day.
They're both getting around pretty good these days.
About the time Mom and Pops got well,,,or better anyways,,My sister got bit by a spider. They wasn't sure what kind at first and messed up and gave her the wrong medication. Her Liver had practically shut down and she required 5 units of blood to get her going again. But it was touch and go with her for awhile there too.
And she's up and going again too.
We did have a great family reunion in October, and I guess that's where I really realized..
"I'm in charge of the family reunion stuff !!"
I had decided to have an auction, hopefully of things donated and made by family members.
I must tell you,,,I have some crafty family members. We raised about $330 from the auction and after donations and such we had $520.
Crocheted baby blanket,kitchen towels,a huge family reunion picture from the late 30's, and a 54 year old plant,a knife made by Pops, cutting boards,home deco,,,,simply amazing.
Then we had a Dirty Santa Party on Dec.11th
That's a vicious game. You get your present and your setting there basking in all the Christmas cheer and joy. Admiring your present and some _____ comes over and takes it from you.
Like WTF? We had grandaughters stealing from Granny, Granny stealing from grandkids. A grandpa stealing from his grandson. Oh my gosh it was hilarious :o)
And here I set today, counting my blessings,,
on vacation the week of Christmas,,It doesn't get much better than this folks.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
An elderly spinster who was a dog lover agreed
to look after and house her neighbors dog whilst the neighbors went on their holidays.
The only problem was that the spinsters own dog
was a bitch that was in 'heat' and the neighbors dog was a male.
Nevertheless she had a large house and she was able to keep the two dogs apart.
As she lay in her bed drifting off to sleep the
spinster was suddenly awakened by an awful howling and moaning sounds from downstairs.
She rushed downstairs to find the dogs locked together, as dogs do when mating.
The dogs were in obvious pain,howling but unable to disengage.
Try as she might she could not part them and she
was perplexed as what to do next.
Though it was late she reluctantly phoned the
vet and after a few rings a rather grumpy voice of the vet answered the phone.
The spinster explained the problem, The vet
said. "I want you to take the phone to the dogs and place it down alongside them. I will then phone your number back and the noise of the
telephone ringing should make the male dog lose his erection and be able to withdraw from the bitch"
"Oh" Said the spinster. "Do you think that will
work?"
"Well" The vet replied , "IT JUST WORKED ON ME".
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THIS ONE HAS TO BE KEPT GOING!!!!!!! AWESOME!!!!!!
SIGN IN A BUSINESS WINDOW, IN ST. LOUIS, MO. !!!!
"WE WOULD RATHER
DO BUSINESS WITH
1000 AL QAIDA TERRORISTS
THAN WITH ONE SINGLE AMERICAN SOLDIER!"
This sign was prominently displayed in the window of a business in St. Louis,MO. and you are probably outraged at the thought of such an inflammatory sign.
However, we are a society which holds Freedom of Speech as perhaps one of our greatest liberties.
And after all, it is only a sign, right?
You may ask : "What kind of business would dare post such a sign?"
Answer: A Funeral Home
(Who said morticians had no sense of humor?)
You gotta love it!!!
God Bless The United States , and keep our Troops Safe and Well.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wish you a "Merry Christmas"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I lost the Trivia Contest at the church social
last week by one question... The question was,,
Where do most women have curly hair ??,,,,
Apparently the correct answer is Africa
Whoda thought ?
Anyways, I was asked to find another place to worship. *Shrugs*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It's been a very freakin busy six months.
Mom and Pops in and out of the hospital, then
my sister took a turn. I can't tell you how
"Blessed" I am to still have them all.
Gained a beautiful,smart daughter-inlaw in
August.It was a great day.
Had a great family reunion back on Oct.16
Granny,Aunts,Uncles and cousins. All of them
awesome. I don't get to see much of them,,,they
live over there on the otherside of the world,,
in Oklahoma. And most of us are strangers.
Some of them,if I passed them on the sidewalk,
I'd never know. I've got cousins I've never even
met. But I hope to get the chance someday.
Yeah,,I know,,I know,,I just live in Arkansas.
But it's about an hour and half away,,,but then
it's a hour and half back.
Makes me miss my naptime. But it's worth missing
to get to see everybody at the sametime.
I look back now and it's funny,,,took awhile for
things to soak in,,,yes I'm kinda slow.
Back in Febuary or March, I showed up at Mom and
Pops and something like the following converstion
took place....
Pops:"Are we going to have a family reunion ??"
Me: (kinda stunned) Well I don't know.
Pops: Well you need to make up your mind.
Me: HUH ??
Pops:Yeah it's your responsibility now,,,your
inheritance.
Me: HUH ???? Really ?? Are you kidding me ??
Now you probably need to know,,me and Pops pull
each others legs all the time. So I'm not really
believing this just yet.
Pops: It's the truth, you are responsible for
making decisions concerning the reunions.
Me: Wow, How did this come about ?
Pops:You said you wanted to get to know the
family better.
Me: Ummm,,I believe my exact words were,,
"I wish I had more time to know the family
better." But okay,,,I think I can handle it.
Pops:I know you can. You're the man for the job.
There's been a huge lack of communication
over the years. We'd say we was having a
reunion and that's all we heard. We never
knew if anybody was going to show up or not.
Fix that.
Me: Ummm okay
Pops:So we gonna have a reunion or not ??
Me: I don't know, let me ask some people.
That was the end of that conversation that day.
A couple days later,,,Pops calls me (he calls me
every morning) and it's cool.
Pops: Good morning Number 1 (he calls me that all
the time, I'm not sure if it's because I'm
his first born or something else) Are we
going to have a family reunion ??
Me: Yeah looks like it.
Pops: Oh Good !! Where we going to have it ?
Me: Umm, I guess where we always do.
Pops: Well you better get around and rent the
building,,weekends don't last long.
Me: Ummmm Okay,are you sure I'm in charge of
this ??
Pops: Yep!
So I do a little internet searching and find some
phone numbers and make a couple of calls and
*WaaLaa* I've rented the building. Nothing to it,
piece of cake. I'm downright proud of myself !!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I found out 70% of the gay population was born gay,,,,the other 30% was sucked into it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The following morning this conversation...
Pops: Good Morning Number 1,,,Have you rented the
building yet ?
Me: Yes Pops,,it's done.
Pops:Oh good,,Least you don't have to worry about
that now. Is anybody coming ?? Who's picking up
the key ? We going to have Potluck or are you
cooking for everybody ?
Me:*Heavy Sigh* I don't know
Pops: Well you need to figure it out ! This stuff
isn't as easy as you think.
Me: Pops,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Pops: Huh ?
Me: Stop worrying about it,,,we have until
October.
Pops: Oh it will be here before you know it.
(and it was)
Well we rolled on.The Queen and I prepared for
our annual trip to Texas to hang with some
internet friends in May.
The Friday before we left, I watched my momma get
hauled away from home in a ambulance.
My mind was like a tornado of thoughts. To go to
Texas or not.
I'm a man of commitment, if I tell somebody I'll
do something I'll do my best to see it thru.
I almost never fail.(Failure is not an option)
Soooo,,having already sent money for food and
telling some friends I'd split the rent with
them. We decided to load up Sunday morning and
head to the Great state of Texas.
Pops called me that morning before we left and
told me he wasn't feeling to good.So that tornado
thing was going on in my mind again. Pops
encouraged me to go to Texas,,,because he's a man
of his word too.
I told him to keep the phone handy and to call
911 if he even thought something was wrong.
So we headed south and I hadn't even unpacked and
I get a call from my sister. Telling me she has
Pops at the hospital. And he wasn't doing too
good.
Yeah,,big O tornado of thoughts.I yakked with Mom
and Pops several times while I was down there.
That's probably the only thing that let me have
some relief. One of the things I love about cell phones !!
We had a great time visiting our friends for a
week and headed back on the following sunday.
Mom was out of the hospital by the time we got
back. She had some stints put in her kidney
tubes. She was in and out of the hospital a couple of times,,infection,,stint removal,,they put them back in,,,and I think she still has one in her today.
Pops was having a tough time tho. He had tripped over the power cord on his impact wrench a couple of days before our trip and apparently that tore some capillaries loose from his intestine and that section had actually died. And they learned this from exploratory surgery. They cut that section out and he was getting better. Then that come loose, so they had to open him back up,,clean him out then reconnected the intestine again. He had quite a time.
There was a couple of times thru all this, Pops told me,,,"I don't know if I'm going to make it."
One time I told him,,"Oh you're going to make it,,we got a family reunion in October. You ain't getting out of that.
He said I'll try and be there, but what if I don't make it ?
I told him,,"Don't worry about it,,if you don't,,
I'm going to drag your old dead ass there and charge the kids a buck a piece to let em poke ya with a stick.
Yep,,,that got him stirrin ;o)
I yakked with him on Fathers Day morning and he was feeling good. So me and the Princess loaded up to go see him and by the time we got there,,he wasn't so good. He had gotten in his wheelchair while the cleaning lady cleaned his room and changed the bedding. He decided to go into the restroom to wash up a bit, and flipped his wheelchair backwards, whacking his head on the floor.
I felt for the old guy, he told me it hurt behind his eyes,said his brain felt bruised. And I imagine it was.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
An old Italian man is dying.
He calls his grandson to his bedside.. " Guido, I wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome plated .38 revolver so you will always remember me."
"But grandpa, I really don't like guns. How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?"
"You lissina me, boy. Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos "
"Somma day you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man...
"Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, 'Time's Up'?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I went to see him a couple days later and he wasn't in his room. That's not always a good feeling but I was quickly informed he was eating at the dining area,,,YAY !!
I joined him at the dining area and he was sitting at a big table with a lot of other patients. I asked him how he felt and got the usual reply,,,"with my fingers".
I asked him,,"Do you remember the other day when you fell backwards in your wheelchair ?"
Pops said "Uhh Huhhh,,,my eyes still hurt.
I said,,,"good thing you landed on your head".
And at that moment,,,I knew he was going to be okay. If for nothing else,,just to get well and kick my ass.
Everybody else at the table thought it was funny.
But I think if Pops would of had the strength, I could of gotten my own room that day.
They're both getting around pretty good these days.
About the time Mom and Pops got well,,,or better anyways,,My sister got bit by a spider. They wasn't sure what kind at first and messed up and gave her the wrong medication. Her Liver had practically shut down and she required 5 units of blood to get her going again. But it was touch and go with her for awhile there too.
And she's up and going again too.
We did have a great family reunion in October, and I guess that's where I really realized..
"I'm in charge of the family reunion stuff !!"
I had decided to have an auction, hopefully of things donated and made by family members.
I must tell you,,,I have some crafty family members. We raised about $330 from the auction and after donations and such we had $520.
Crocheted baby blanket,kitchen towels,a huge family reunion picture from the late 30's, and a 54 year old plant,a knife made by Pops, cutting boards,home deco,,,,simply amazing.
Then we had a Dirty Santa Party on Dec.11th
That's a vicious game. You get your present and your setting there basking in all the Christmas cheer and joy. Admiring your present and some _____ comes over and takes it from you.
Like WTF? We had grandaughters stealing from Granny, Granny stealing from grandkids. A grandpa stealing from his grandson. Oh my gosh it was hilarious :o)
And here I set today, counting my blessings,,
on vacation the week of Christmas,,It doesn't get much better than this folks.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
An elderly spinster who was a dog lover agreed
to look after and house her neighbors dog whilst the neighbors went on their holidays.
The only problem was that the spinsters own dog
was a bitch that was in 'heat' and the neighbors dog was a male.
Nevertheless she had a large house and she was able to keep the two dogs apart.
As she lay in her bed drifting off to sleep the
spinster was suddenly awakened by an awful howling and moaning sounds from downstairs.
She rushed downstairs to find the dogs locked together, as dogs do when mating.
The dogs were in obvious pain,howling but unable to disengage.
Try as she might she could not part them and she
was perplexed as what to do next.
Though it was late she reluctantly phoned the
vet and after a few rings a rather grumpy voice of the vet answered the phone.
The spinster explained the problem, The vet
said. "I want you to take the phone to the dogs and place it down alongside them. I will then phone your number back and the noise of the
telephone ringing should make the male dog lose his erection and be able to withdraw from the bitch"
"Oh" Said the spinster. "Do you think that will
work?"
"Well" The vet replied , "IT JUST WORKED ON ME".
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THIS ONE HAS TO BE KEPT GOING!!!!!!! AWESOME!!!!!!
SIGN IN A BUSINESS WINDOW, IN ST. LOUIS, MO. !!!!
"WE WOULD RATHER
DO BUSINESS WITH
1000 AL QAIDA TERRORISTS
THAN WITH ONE SINGLE AMERICAN SOLDIER!"
This sign was prominently displayed in the window of a business in St. Louis,MO. and you are probably outraged at the thought of such an inflammatory sign.
However, we are a society which holds Freedom of Speech as perhaps one of our greatest liberties.
And after all, it is only a sign, right?
You may ask : "What kind of business would dare post such a sign?"
Answer: A Funeral Home
(Who said morticians had no sense of humor?)
You gotta love it!!!
God Bless The United States , and keep our Troops Safe and Well.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wish you a "Merry Christmas"
and if you don't like that,,,you can Kiss My Grits
Now the rest of you can go nuts trying to change the color of the ball.
Remember, you have to click on the ball to change it's color.
Yes it really does change color.
Whoever made this up needs to be shot!
The Bastard !! Grrrrrrrrr
Have a great day !! Hopefully see you again soon !!
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I welcome all decent comments, please refrain from using foul language. That doesn't mean you can't criticize, but keep it clean. My momma may show up.